I no longer live in the states. Yup. I'm out of San Francisco and Salt Lake City for good. Well, at least that's my mindset. Before, it was about school, internship and the stress I had to put up with. Now, I'm living in Phuket, Thailand like how I have imagined many years ago. It's not as bad as I used to picture it. The weather's nice, the setting is so serene in Karon. I liked many things here. The trees, animals, nature, etc.. There are many Bob Marley merchandise on sale everywhere. Pajamas, shirts, pants, small shoulder bag, flash drive cover, bandanas, etc.. Bob Marley's music is very preferred here. I could see why because his music is caribbean style. I liked that part. Sometimes I do miss San Francisco. I could talk to anybody including strangers and they will listen. But here, people have different focus in life totally different from mines. I guess I do think about San Francisco almost everyday. Well, that's all for now. I'll come back to write down more of my thoughts some other day.

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I gotta be honest and say that every time comic-con happens, I always feel bummed out. I always wanted to go but never have enough money to travel, buy tickets, rent a hotel room, etc.. Even if I was ready, I needed a buddy/friend who is as obsessed to go with me. It's just something I can't grow out of. It's been me forever. It sounds so childish, but if I never go, I'll never get over it. I just need to experience this type of thing at least once and decide later if I'll go every year or not. I went to WonderCon a year ago, but still that wasn't enough. It was so short, I can barely remember what went on except that one negative thing I can't seem to forget. Being late to meet the cast of A Nightmare On Elm Street. I can't seem to get over that. As long as I can remember, I've been an obsessed freak over movies, cartoons, music, etc..

My sis majors in television, news, etc.. She explains to me that it's a way they make money. I know all of this. When people wear the movie's merchandise, they're a walking advertisement. That doesn't concern me because I like what I like. It doesn't matter. Comic-Con is basically a place for people to sell their thing. I always knew this, and yet, I don't care. I want to experience a fun road trip. 4 days is not long, not short, just perfect. If I did went for 4 days, I would not leave until the day is up. For me, a vacation is a real vacation. You should allow yourself to go crazy and do something different from your usual and ordinary day. An ordinary day would be go to work, come back home, eat, rest and sleep. I won't even rest on my vacation days. This is what's fun about it. When the days are up, you'll be sleeping in, waking up from an exhausting week. I've done something like this before. Did something fun, got extremely tired and wake up from an exhausting day with my head all sore, thinking about all the fun things you did. When you go back to work, you don't feel tired. Like this one time, I went to the Star Trek screening with my sister. We waited 5-6 hours to get into the IMAX theatre. The wait was exhausting because we both woke up really early that day for school. When we got in, I almost fell asleep many times, but still awake watching the film. I went home, exhausted, went to sleep, and didn't wake up for school the next day. I SKIPPED school. It was so fun. The next day, I went to school. People asked me where I went. I said, "I watched a long movie last night at a screening and couldn't wake up the next day." It was fun. Missed one day of school. I passed that class. Everything turned out well.

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This guy at my internship said I traveled back in time. He was surprised to know that I knew so much about 80's/gothic music. I'm 20 years old, but I was supposed to be born in an earlier era. People make fun of the way I dress. They said I dress too conservative. My interest in movies and music also. I like some of today's stuff, but my favorites will always be stuff from the earlier times. I'm obsessed with Medieval/Renaissance. I love looking at rural places. I like movies like The Secret of Kells. It's just everything I do tends to be outdated. No one wears my style. I don't know where I got the idea for some of the things I do. It just happens naturally.

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My internship has been great because I love eating and making vegetarian food. I get to taste and eat tasty vegetarian foods 3 days a week at an almost fine-dining restaurant. I think the restaurant is sort of overpriced, but there might be a reason why it is. The food is really good, but I wouldn't pay for it. I haven't been to a restaurant that tastes like this one. I know how to make the food in this restaurant and it uses simple ingredients, but I'm questioning why it taste so good. Perfect for my taste buds. Maybe it's the room temperature and ingredients. The ingredients are super in my opinion. The fruit has the perfect sweetness. The avocados are perfect ripe/texture/taste. They know how to get good produce. Of course because they have their own farm, which explains why other place can't do it like them. I noticed that sometimes I overindulged in eating vegetables/fruits/grains/spices. I just love the taste of vegetables more than anything else. Yes, sounds strange, but it feels good eating it. Which is why I'm a near vegetarian.

The only main reason I couldn't be a full vegetarian is because my family needs to eat some sort of meat. They think they need it. My sister really likes fish fillet and shrimp. She occasionally eats chicken, and no other meat. For me, I don't like eating any animals. It doesn't feel right for me, but sometimes I eat it because that's the thing I cook for her. She wanted it. It would cost more to make 2 different meals, and uses more time.

I've always been obsessed with everything vegan though. The thing about vegan foods is that it doesn't have milk/cream smell. Tastes better and brings out the flavor. The first time I ate vegetarian was when I was 17 and I had a real vegetarian mindset in Fall 2009, when I turned vegan at almost end of that year. My vegan diet wasn't successful because my mom got impatient with me. That's when I had to quit, but I didn't want to. So I eat what she makes. I can never like meat again even if someone makes me eat them. I'll eat it, but I won't feel good about it. I barely eat meat nowadays. When my mom moved to Utah, I make my own food.

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Went to drop off my mom because she is off to Utah and not coming back for many months. I sort of feel insecure without her because I have never lived without her. She is my mom, friend, teacher, assistant, buddy, guardian, etc.. I'll miss her, but good thing I have school. It helps to not have to think like this when I'm busy with internship, studying and occasionally movies. I got to studying the whole section of accounting because it's part of my major. Meeting with the teacher at 7:30am in the morning. Came home late from dropping off my mom. Things will be fine. I can cook for myself. I cook vegetarian when I'm alone or eat vegetarian when I'm on my own. I live with my sister now, and she wants meat, so I'll probably have to make that too. So yeah, many things to think about. I have a math test coming up on Wednesday, so that will distract me for good. I'll study my brains off. I feel like I was gonna be sad, but then again I'm not because she's going there for a purpose. She didn't leave me. I'm old enough to take care of myself.

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Changes. Big changes are definitely happening. My mom is moving to a different state to work, and after graduation, I will be moving out of SF with my sister as well to where my mom is going. Graduation is 3 months away! I'm so excited. It feels like a dream come true to finally get out of San Fran. I'm tired of this city because people view me as a person with "conservative values." They didn't say exactly like that, but a friend said, "You always dress conservative." A couple of old classmates/friends tell me that I needed a makeover. They said I should wear tighter clothes and go to bars. It's not my thing. I'm a christian. I'm finally moving to a place I feel like where I belong too. Here, I'm just viewed as reserved. I don't mean to be, but that's just the way I am. I don't drink and I don't want to, but people like to encourage me too. Why is dressing appropriate immediately viewed as conservative, obsolete, unfashionable or old-fashioned?

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